In my nearly four decades of being bearded, I have never put as much introspective thought and detailed analysis to my facial fur as you have posted. No doubt the dyslexic-albino-wannabee-walrus-sea-lion of a moustache that accompanies my beard would be no match for your larger albino lobster.

Happy belated birthday, friend. At the potentially disastrous ignition event you recounted just before your birthday, I hope you were able to blow out your beard and make a early birthday wish. Can't tell from the braided picture how much you may have lost in the fire, but it appears to be essentially unscathed and robust as ever.

Not trying to hurry you over the hill, Tom, but I wonder if your beard has subliminally signaled to any businesses that you are eligible for their "senior discount" even though you just transitioned out of your forties. I was a little taken aback the first time I "automatically" got a senior discount -- not because I wasn't eligible, but because it was clearly because of the white beard and not something that I had asked for. In younger days, the beard meant I was rarely ever carded to prove I was "old enough" to buy something. Seems to now carry forward to the other end of age verification as well.

Triibeard's Thirty-NINE years of being bearded    (The recent journey from a short- to a long-beard)
Introducing LEGO-Sheriff Triibeard     (The origin story for our polymeric polychromatic hero)
Sheriff Triibeard and The Case of the Missing Beard Balm   (In search of that scoundrel RiffRaff)
Sheriff Triibeard and the Hermit Hoarder    (Consequences of acquisitiveness)

In a world of shorn faces, it is our privilege to offer those around us the exquisite opportunity to know a gentleman with a beard.