Tom, Lady Triibeard and I would look forward to sharing a meal at Biwa with you and Lady E anytime we make it to Portland. Together we shall show the world how to succeed in bearding without starving or needing a shower after meals. Perhaps we could sell tickets. My only concern at a teppan-yaki restaurant is the potential for collateral damage from the flash-ignition of the cooking sherry or whatever explosive ingredient they use during the "show."

I'm also cautious about the Beard Board becoming NSFW after the publication of your "barefoot and apron-ed" photo. You are wearing shorts with that I trust. This cooking demonstration isn't just some "flask in the pan" event, is it?

Triibeard's Thirty-NINE years of being bearded    (The recent journey from a short- to a long-beard)
Introducing LEGO-Sheriff Triibeard     (The origin story for our polymeric polychromatic hero)
Sheriff Triibeard and The Case of the Missing Beard Balm   (In search of that scoundrel RiffRaff)
Sheriff Triibeard and the Hermit Hoarder    (Consequences of acquisitiveness)

In a world of shorn faces, it is our privilege to offer those around us the exquisite opportunity to know a gentleman with a beard.