It turns out that there is a barber shop a couple of towns over (you know, through the woods, over the hill, past Grandmother's house).  Went there last week on the recommendation of a bearded friend.  The guy there was great.  He was able to identify the strong and weak spots, and make recommendations for cutting and combing to even things out.  Through strategic trimming in several spots he was also able to "relieve the hair pressure" that was causing my hair to curl.  My beard looks like a beard again.  I also picked up some unscented stash wax and have started trying to train it out.