Wowzer. This is my first time on this thread, and I have some serious beard envy now. Pipey, good on ya, bearded brother! That thing is wicked! I also love how it rocks so well when you were wearing the suit at the wedding. Definitely a classy look.

I'm wondering if you wouldn't mind sharing with all of us how you went about trimming your monster.

First off, did you feel any anxiety?
Did you use scissors or clippers?
How did you decide what to snip and what to leave?
Did you have a shape in mind before you started, or did you just go with the natural curves?
Did you use a mirror to guide you, or did you just look down your beard with your own eyes?

There may be other questions I didn't think of you that you think might be pertinent information, or some of you other guys might have some you want to ask this legendary beard cultivator.
,

"So Hanun took David’s servants and shaved off half of their beards, and cut off their garments in the middle as far as their hips, and sent them away. When they told it to David, he sent to meet them, for the men were greatly humiliated. And the king said, 'Stay at Jericho until your beards grow, and then return.'" - 2 Samuel 10:4-5